The Silmarils are jewels, okay? There are three of them. They hold the light of the two trees of Valinor. Um-hum. Following me so far? Not difficult, is it?

I have been reading The Silmarillion for two months now. It’s a hell of a slog. It’s not a big book, it’s just a painful book. I’m going to work on a potted version for those who don’t want to read it but would quite like to know the gist. Like those yellow books you have at A-level that tell you what a book is about! I never saw the point. Read that book or read the actual book you are supposed to be read it’s all book learnin’. Unless they’re significantly shorter, like about 2 pages as opposed to 340. I’m going to aim for a few paragraphs.