So the boxes were moved across from flppy’s parents’ house today, by a removals firm. Meant I spent my FIRST NIGHT ALONE in the house. Oh, yeah. I slept on the wrong side of the bed, and everything. I just didn’t care. Felt a bit empty in the morning, the house (and me, I mean, without breakfast and with only that disgusting chicken thing from last night), but that’s how it goes, I guess.

Aaaanyway. The boxes were loaded up by the nice removal men at one end (overseen by the oaten one) and then she came over here while they did a drop-off and eventually turned up in Walthamstow. While we were just, you know, making the place ready for the boxes, I was dashing about the house and, in a fit of I don’t know what, joie de vivre, I guess, I leapt from the third step to land on the living room floor.

Well, not quite. You see, I forgot (somehow) that there’s a door in the way. So the top of my skull went CLONK against the doorframe with a sound not unlike a coconut being dropped onto a polished wooden floor. I dropped and sprawled on the bottom step, feeling a bit foolish and a lot in pain. The pain went pretty rapidly and I don’t even have a lump on the top of my head, let alone blood.

However. When the boxes were in place and I was taking the vacuum cleaner down to clear out the cupboard-under-the-stairs, I turned sideways at the bottom of the steps, then, hastily, turned back. I guess I grew a few feet in the night, Ent Draught I don’t doubt, because without lifting off the ground, my brow connected – again with the CLONK – with the exact same door jamb. Muuuch more pain. I did have the presence of mind to yell “Oh, shit, not again!” as a I staggered about clutching my forehead. When my hand came away – uh-oh, blood.

So, that’s two head injuries in a day, and a nice dark patch on my left eyebrow. Oh, and a swelling I can actually see, peeking out into my vision. Clearly, I am klutz central today. You may leave your sympathies in the space provided below.