Yes, so, Twitter. Fun! One of those short-lived obsessions for me, probably. I get those. But who knows? I still blog.
But it’s the weirdness of having actual, factual famous people on there, all chatting away like they’re normal. Which, of course, they are. But still! This morning I was messaged by Yoko Ono! Okay, it was an automated message, but OMG! She broke up the Beatles – she’s, like, my hero! And the real Amber Benson is following my posts, which is fucking nuts because she’s got like thousands of people following her and she’s only following a couple of hundred. What made my profile stick out? Or, you know, maybe she just follows everyone who follows her for a little bit to see if they’re mentals or not. I think, given my posts today, she’ll not only not follow now but actively block me.
But, you know, suddenly you don’t feel like your posts are very interesting. "Watered yucca plant" "Excel just crashed". Until you look at what everyone else is posting and you realise that it’s all exactly the same, more or less. No-one is twittering earth-shattering news. It’s all watered yuccas and crashing software. It is – for now – a great leveller. When my posts about wanting a hat are given the same weight as Jonathan Ross talking about interviewing Morrissey or Yoko Ono announcing some charitable event or whatever.. well, that’s a good day for the internet.